I Solve The Gay Teen Suicide Problem

5 Oct

A lot of attention has been paid to the recent spate of gays killing themselves over being bullied. Many people believe that these victims are no different children who are being bullied because they are fat or because they are nerdy.  Well, there’s a key difference. Fat kids can talk openly about being fat. They can talk to fat teachers or fat parents, and they can then go on and get fitter, maybe lose some fat like I did.

Nerdy kids can talk to nerdy teachers who will tell them that being nerdy is cool nowadays. Nerdy kids are smarter than the rest. Maybe the nerdy kid can learn to be more outgoing like I did.

And the gay kids, well they’ll watch Glee or reruns of Will & Grace, talk to their imaginary friend and receive no guidance from gay teachers because teachers aren’t allowed to talk about how being gay is totally natural. They can’t talk to kids about how gay is natural because one of the mothers will not want their child exposed to such a “hot button issue.”

The solution here is to remove the mother, or maybe a less extreme version would be to protect LGBT teachers.  Children should be fine to approach their teachers about issues regarding sexuality, there should be LGBT counselors and the like.

Great solution right? Though my hopes aren’t high on this one.  A lot of those mothers out there are Catholic and they’re just fine with the Pope telling Africa that condoms make AIDS worse. Telling American kids that being homosexual is abnormal is a cakewalk next to that doozy.

The War on LGBT Teachers

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