25. There’s a difference between a partner and a boyfriend/girlfriend

21 May

You’re prepared to understand love and what it means to find a significant other by the time you’re exposed to your first Disney film, because otherwise they wouldn’t make sense.  Before you root for the prince to kiss the princess you’re pretty much disgusted by the whole notion of romance…

It could be the story’s fault too. I find that kids sometimes have a good BS detector.  They notice when a kiss is unearned.

Still, love songs start to make sense once you’ve fallen in love and go out into the world to find a boyfriend/girlfriend or someone who puts you into a friend zone, but while a substantial amount of work is devoted to the feeling a love, not a whole lot of words or songs are devoted to finding something MORE than a boyfriend or girlfriend.

I think there’s a good and not-at-all evil reason for that; there’s absolutely no consensus as to when it is that you find that special someone.  Some people might require a six inch stilleto up the anus worn by a willing woman, others might require good conversation, or someone totally into drama. 

“You get me because I love Showgirls” is an innocuous song title but it might be a surprisingly good start to finding something more special than a regular boyfriend, but some great romances might start that way (okay, mine was that way, don’t judge).

So you can’t define it, but I’ve noticed a few differences between the greatest most functional (and sometimes dysfunctional) partners that separates them from the rest.

– They’re comfortable with each other
– They laugh
– They call each other out on bs

I find couples I admire only admit to certain things of interest in a glacier of truth and secrets they share with each other.  One time someone told me their boyfriend used to be an escort, and didn’t say anything more.  Que escandaloso!

I think if love songs make sense when you fall in love then life makes sense when you find a partner.  Love is a form of nourishment that grows in abundance when you’re with someone you love, and when you find it you feel more confident and capable than you did before.


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